Deck the Halls (But Maybe Not With “Last Christmas”): Elrondo Sparklebeard’s Guide to Christmas Office Karaoke Etiquette

Red Dragon Writer
Dec 6, 2025
3 min read

Updated: Dec 8, 2025

Greetings, mortals and mid-level managers! Elrondo Sparklebeard here, Supreme Spokeself of the ELF (Elfin Lyrical Federation, for those not in the know), and I come bearing tidings of great joy—and a few gentle warnings—about that most hallowed of holiday traditions: the Christmas office karaoke party.

Now, before you warm up your vocal cords and reach for the nearest microphone (or, if you’re in IT, the nearest empty coffee mug), let’s discuss the unspoken rules of festive song selection. Because, as any elf worth their pointy shoes will tell you, there’s a fine line between spreading Christmas cheer and inciting a Yuletide mutiny.

1. The “Last Christmas” Clause

Let’s address the reindeer in the room. Yes, George Michael’s “Last Christmas” is a classic. Yes, it’s catchy. Yes, it’s been played approximately 47,000 times since November 1st. But here’s the thing: if you’re the third person to select it at the office karaoke, you may find yourself on the receiving end of a withering HR glare (and possibly a lump of coal in your next payslip).

Remember, nothing says “I’m creatively bankrupt” quite like belting out “Last Christmas” for the umpteenth time while Brenda from Accounts weeps softly into her mulled wine. Be bold! Be original! Or at least, be considerate.

2. The Slade Situation

Ah, Slade’s “Merry Xmas Everybody.” The song that launches a thousand air guitars and at least one regrettable attempt at a Noddy Holder impression. While it’s tempting to scream “IT’S CHRISTMAAAS!” at the top of your lungs, consider the following: is it, in fact, Christmas? Or is it December 7th and you’re still wearing your Movember moustache? Timing, my friends, is everything.

If you must go full Slade, do so with gusto—but perhaps wait until the eggnog has been liberally distributed and the boss has already attempted “Fairytale of New York” in a key not yet discovered by science.

3. The Mariah Minefield

Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” is the Mount Everest of office karaoke. Many attempt the climb; few reach the summit. If you possess the vocal range of a startled reindeer, by all means, go for it. But if your falsetto is more “wounded walrus” than “Christmas angel,” consider a duet or, better yet, a silent night.

4. The Polite Playlist

Politeness, dear humans, is the true spirit of Christmas. When selecting your song, ask yourself: Will this bring joy to my colleagues, or will it trigger flashbacks to shopping mall soundtracks and endless elevator rides? A few safe bets:

“Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” (bonus points for actual rocking)
“Jingle Bell Rock” (see above)
“Santa Baby” (if you can keep a straight face)
“Feliz Navidad” (for the linguistically adventurous)

5. The Group Singalong Gambit

If in doubt, gather a group. Nothing says “team spirit” like a slightly off-key rendition of “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” Just remember: if you’re going to assign solos, don’t give the high notes to Dave from Logistics unless you want to see glassware shatter.

6. The Aftermath

Finally, remember that what happens at office karaoke does not, in fact, stay at office karaoke. There will be videos. There will be memes. There may even be a new Slack channel dedicated to your Mariah moment. Embrace it. After all, Christmas comes but once a year—and so does the opportunity to see your boss in a Santa hat, crooning “Blue Christmas” with suspicious sincerity.

So, sing loud, sing proud, and for the love of all things elfin, maybe give “Last Christmas” and “IT’S CHRISTMAAAS!” a rest this year. Your colleagues (and your Supreme Spokeself) will thank you.