Ian
McFarlane

By Elrondo Sparklebeard, Supreme Spokeself, Elf Liberation Front, Chief Social Media Whizz at Ink Weavers (note on that in next post), and Unofficial Winner of Best Beard Sparkle 700 Years Running Greetings, my sparkling readers! Today, I’ve managed to corner two of the most chaotic entities currently fluttering—or floating—through London: Toby, a shapeshifting druid with a flair for midair mischief , and Charlie, a three-hundred-year-old ghost with an eye-roll that could col

Greetings, humans, taller-humans, and mysteriously beige individuals. It is I, Elrondo Sparklebeard , returning to grace your screens with a festive nugget of wisdom. Today I bring you a public service announcement so essential, so culturally transformative, that I’m surprised you haven’t already demanded it in your town halls and supermarkets: It is time for a 24-Hour Elf Cam. Yes, you heard correctly. An uninterrupted live broadcast of elf activity—raw, unfiltered, aggressi

Greetings, humans, elves, and those undecided! It is I, Elrondo Sparklebeard , here to sprinkle some festive wisdom across your mortal screens. Yes— screens , plural. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned this year, it’s that the modern world has far too many ways to watch things and none of them show enough elves. Christmas approaches, which means two things: We at the Elf Liberation Front start sharpening our candy canes for the annual Workplace Negotiations with Sant